What’s It REALLY Like Marrying An Asian Woman?

It’s time to get real.

After getting past the meet-and-greet and then the dating phase, the married phase is something completely different. Past all the fantasies and the honeymoon phase, what is it really like marrying an Asian woman?

We know a lot of people have had success with interracial relationships but we also know that men and women, as couples, are far from perfect. Arguments and problems happen during the course of these relationships too. That’s just the natural order of things, though. It wouldn’t be normal if a loving couple didn’t fight or have issues from time to time.

Still, it doesn’t have to always be bittersweet. If you ask how to meet Asian women with the intent of marrying one, you need to at least get an idea of what that’s like.

Getting Used To Different Cultures Clashing

This could be a double-edged sword.

On one hand, it’s very interesting and fascinating to become a part of something entirely new and different. You get to experience her culture and traditions with the eyes of a foreigner and since you two are married now, you are semi-infinitely part of that too. The new things you experience from her part of the world will open your eyes, you get to see so many things you’ve only ever seen on screen and also you get to LIVE in it.

And on the other hand, there’s also the part where her own beliefs clash with yours on an uncomfortable level.

It can happen. Interracial relationships are hard to get through because two people with different backgrounds, traditions and upbringing are going against one another while being simultaneously tied by marriage. It’s uncomfortable having to live with someone who shares a belief that you are against because it was what you were told as a young kid. She will also feel the same and feel like her beliefs have been personally invaded.

The worst part is that you two can’t really escape from each other because you got married. You are forced to talk about it, although that really isn’t a bad thing.

Talking helps, who would’ve thought? The best way to get past this is to find a middle ground by just openly talking about everything. See what she’s willing to let go of and what boundaries shouldn’t be crossed and she will do the same for you. Of course, it’s not going to be as simple as that but as stated before, relationships are never perfect.

When You Expect Different Things From Each Other…

There will be turmoil. What else is new? For example, if you’re a Western guy who was taught that relationships are built on equality and is the only acceptable type of relationship there is, and you’re marrying a Chinese woman who prefers a traditional relationship, expect awkward moments and maybe some frustration.

There will be times when she wants you to make decisions and be the man in the relationship, while she perfectly embodies traditional roles of an Asian woman by refusing to answer if you ask her what she wants instead. Basically, she will expect you to behave a certain way and “Be The Man” even though you don’t really know what that means because to her, it means something entirely different from what you’ve been taught.

When this happens, you have to get past the expectations and understand that at times, she will do something you don’t understand. This means unlearning some of the things you’ve been taught in order to please her. Why? Because what works with one woman will backfire with another.

The Food Is Amazing

Marriage was built on love with the intention of happiness between two people, so of course there’s more good than bad to it. The food gets varied when you marry someone from another country since they have their own cuisine so of course, you get the perks of getting to eat delicious food not native to your country.

Since Asian cuisine consists of several other major regional cuisines, depending on where the wife lived, you might be subjected to a certain type of food.

For example, if she was from East Asia — China, Japan, Korea, Mongolia, Singapore, Taiwan and Tibet — you might get to enjoy staple foods like rice, noodles, mung beans, soybeans, high-quality seafood, mutton, bok choy and tea.

If she was from Southeast Asia — The Philippines, Indonesia, East Malaysia, Thailand, etc. — you’d get to experience a cuisine that includes a strong emphasis on lightly prepared dishes with a strong aromatic component. Dishes like chicken adobo, spring rolls, stir-fried noodles and such might be what you eat because of her!

The point here is that you get to eat like a king. And the best part is you two cooking the food together and learning about the dishes from each other’s countries.

“Accidentally” Learning Her Language

We say “accidentally” because when you live with a foreigner for a certain amount of time, you start to adapt their tics. Maybe you haven’t really noticed it yet but if ever you catch yourself saying an expression in her language while doing mundane chores, then that’s when you know you’re learning it “accidentally”.

It doesn’t make you fluent though. You can be, of course, but at least you have a good head start when you do want to learn it properly later on. It’ll be easier on your end too, and you’ll have your wife to guide you along the way.

We can only speak for the success stories we’ve witnessed and their experiences, but if the points here help enlighten you on what it’s like marrying an Asian woman, then we hope we’ve given you confidence. After all, the reason you’re here reading this is because you’re interested in getting married, right?

If you’ve already met the lady of your dreams from an Asian women dating site, then all you need to do is make sure she’s the one before proposing.

Good luck!

Professional Matchmaker and Relationship Counselor at www.mydreamasian.com