Modern Dating
What Is the Manosphere and Should Single Men Join It?
Has someone ever made you feel worthless? Have you ever met a lady who claims to be a feminist but is really just a man-hater in disguise?
If you have, then you’ve got every right to be angry. You probably feel as though your only option is to fight back. If you can’t find a good woman because it seems like all women hate men, then shouldn’t you just hate women back? After all, isn’t that the only option left?
If you ask a member of the manosphere, they’ll probably say yes.
But going down this road will not lead you to happiness. Joining a group that promotes negative views on all women won’t give you the loving and committed relationship you’re looking for.
You can “fight back” against misguided people who hate men unfairly, but the manosphere can’t help you meet women who, like you, just want to find someone they can love and be with.
Here’s why.
What Is the Manosphere?
The manosphere is a network of online communities for men who are against women’s empowerment.
A play on the word “blogosphere,” the manosphere first surfaced on Blogspot in 2009. The term became widely used when the news media started using it in articles about men who engage in online harassment and misogynistic violence.
Later, adult content producer Ian Ironwood popularized it by combining a variety of blogs and forums into a book titled “The Manosphere: A New Hope for Masculinity.”
The Manosphere vs What You Should Do Instead
Unrealistic Demands vs Reasonable Expectations
Due to its focus on negativity and manipulation, the manosphere can create unrealistic expectations of what men and women should be in relationships. A lot of these groups promote animosity or even hatred toward women and girls.
According to a 2021 report by The Guardian, a group of Involuntary Celibates or Incels has been connected to numerous instances of severe violence and even homicide.
While it’s important to make your voice heard and to look for a woman who fits your preferences, you should also keep your expectations reasonable. You can’t demand the kind of love and care that you yourself are unable or unwilling to offer.
A relationship is a partnership. You need to love your partner for her to love you back.
Manipulation vs Open Communication
Certain groups within the manosphere, such as “Pickup Artist” communities, advocate using deceptive methods to draw in women. This method puts short-term gains ahead of long-term relationships, undermining true connection and respect.
For instance, Joss Jefferies, one of the first pickup artists to popularize the use of NLP (neuro-linguistic programming) hypnosis to entice women, asserts that a woman’s subconscious mind can be reprogrammed to be more receptive to a man’s advances by using specific words or conversational topics.
Instead of resorting to psychological manipulation, you can build healthier relationships with women by focusing on honest and open communication and respecting personal boundaries.
Recognizing that everyone deserves to be treated with dignity is important.
Objectification vs Appreciation
A lot of manosphere members also see women as sexual objects, and that is a problem.
Women are human beings just like you. If you truly want a woman to be attracted to you, you must embrace her for who she is — her values, talents, and even her flaws.
Violence Against Women vs Natural Intimacy
Violence against women will never lead you to true love.
Not only are the effects of intimate partner violence long-lasting, they also have a profound impact on a woman’s life.
In cases where you’re unhappy in your relationship, choose to settle it calmly and amicably. You don’t have to raise your hand to prove a point.
Instead, practice physical intimacy and touch as a way to express love and affection. A woman who is good for you will match your energy instead of shying away from your embrace.
Warped Sense of Self vs Healthy Self-Confidence
What is the manosphere if not a twisted idea of what a real man should be?
It claims to teach you to be the best “alpha male” you can be, but in reality, the things they teach will only damage your sense of self.
So instead of following their lead in promoting more hatred, why don’t you work on developing a healthy self-esteem so that no woman (or man) can ever bring you down?
When you finally know exactly who you are and what you want, you can be open to finding the love you know you deserve and start your ideal relationship.
Instead of joining hate groups, you can look for genuine dating opportunities and meet women who actually value you. You can also look for positive male role models who themselves have great women and partners in their lives.
A real man is a lover, not a hater. It may take a while to meet a good woman who really knows what she’s saying when it comes to love and relationships, but she’s out there. Don’t push her away.
You will meet each other in good time.
Reference:
Beckett, L. (2021). The misogynist incel movement is spreading. Should it be classified as a terror threat?. The Guardian.
https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2021/mar/03/incel-movement-terror-threat-canada
