INTERRACIAL DATING
Don’t Talk About These When Dating An Asian Girl
We almost always put up our best behavior on first dates. For what reason? So we can have a second date. And a third. And so on, especially if we are really into the person we’re dating.
For the date to not end up as a steaming heap of utter failure, we avoid talking about topics we may deem as sensitive. Even married couples have boundaries, so being culturally and personally sensitive is a good idea.
When we talk about Asian women, we aren’t talking just about Asian Americans, but literally women from Asia. Now, obviously, they aren’t a monolith and each nationality carries its own unique heritage and history. But there are a few overarching qualities that many Asian neighbors share, whether they are from China, Thailand, Japan, Vietnam, or the Philippines. This makes dating in Asian countries a little bit different from what Westerners are used to.
And while your date might be super open-minded and game for any topic under the sun, you have to wait for her to show she’s comfortable with what you want to talk about.
On your first few dates with her, you might want to avoid talking about the following:
1. Topics of Intimacy
Asians aren’t raised to talk openly about sex or their private lives. Countries like Thailand highly discourage public displays of affection. Granted, this isn’t something you bring to the table with any woman, it’s just not something Asians are willing to talk about.
Wait until you get certifiably comfortable with each other. Take things slowly. If she likes you enough, she’ll open her heart to you.
2. Her country’s politics
Unless you are genuinely curious to learn about her thoughts on how her country is run, it’s generally not something you want to be talking about. And even if she cares enough to give an opinion, it’s not something that will exactly lighten up the room.
Stay focused on her.
3. Bashing family members
You might be fine calling your brother a piece of garbage, but even if she isn’t too thrilled about her family, she’ll prefer to keep those matters behind closed doors. Asians are big on family, and her parents’ opinions matter to her.
So while you may have familial issues, it’s best to be delicate about them. She may not always be happy about her family, but she’ll at least give them their due respect.
4. First world problems
No doubt there are a lot of rich Asians. But if she is from a still-developing country, then she might not find the fact that you can’t find the right color Porshe you want a cute story.
Women like down-to-earth guys, no matter where they come from.
5. Western social issues
No doubt there are pressing social issues everywhere you go. But you need to understand that she may not relate to your set of issues. Most Asians live in homogenous societies. Their ideas of racism or poverty may genuinely be different from yours. While you may learn from each other, the first date isn’t the platform for espousing certain ideals.
At the end of the day, these topics apply to almost any dating scenario, no matter who you’re dating. But if you have the right chemistry with that person, the topics pick themselves. As long as you treat her with love and respect, you’ll eventually win her heart.
Suggested read